The weird things that I sometimes find in my private message window on IRC:

[Goth643] hi i was wondering if you could tell me how to lift things up without touching them i would really like to know. can you help? thanks!!
[Goth643] i would really like to know about this. any help i would really appreciate it you know thanks for all your inputs about it!!

[Pameleah_] scottish peole are certanly different lokk at trainspotting.... rentons friends wernt exactly normal eh?

Ignoring the atrocious spelling here for a moment, if you can bear to... who in their right fucking mind watches (or reads, though I doubt little miss brainiac is even aware it's a novel in the first place) Trainspotting and thinks it's an accurate representation of the average person, let alone Scotsman?!

There are frequent days in that particular IRC channel when you can all but feel your braincells atrophy.

[17:51:06] broken hheartedx: ur gay
[17:51:20] Varencienne: seeing as I'm pregnant, not likely
[17:51:53] broken hheartedx: ok.... i thought you were a guy srry ur screy adn a fake goth
[17:52:22] Varencienne: and you're an illiterate dweeb who harrasses people online...
[17:52:56] broken hheartedx: is that english?
[17:53:12] Varencienne: yes, unlike that garbled mess you typed earlier
[17:53:12] *** Error while sending IM: This user is currently not logged on

[17:54:58] broken hheartedx: are you sure ur not a guy?
[17:55:15] Varencienne: vagina, 2 tits, and a baby... nope
[17:55:26] broken hheartedx: or are you lieing
[17:56:43] Varencienne: if you had more than 2 braincells to rub together, and considering the few places where you could have gotten my AIM id from, you could quite easily verify whether or not I am
[17:56:53] Varencienne: unfortunately, you don't have 2 braincells, let alone more
[17:57:15] Varencienne: now, if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go do something interesting, like watch mold grow outside
[17:57:19] broken hheartedx: r u a geek?
[17:57:19] *** User has been blocked